Week 3, Day 17
Have you ever been called fat? Or skinny?
I have been called fat more times in my life than I care to remember. Kids can be cruel, teenagers can be cruel, hell ex boyfriends that want to try and make you feel bad about yourself after you break up are cruel. I’ve always been fairly confident even being a thicker girl. So usually I never gave a second thought to my weigh. I’ve mentioned before that I danced from the ages of 2 until 18 so I was always solid even being a bigger chick. Dancing and the girls I danced with never made me feel self-conscious. It was always the kids I went to school with. I wasn’t unpopular or picked on all the time, but I would hear whispers. When someone wanted to be mean they would call me fat in some colorful way to my face.
Luckily I only have a few times that really stick out to me. I’ve been called fat other times “playfully” or at times that I just kind of dismiss. One time on the bus in elementary school I stood up to a boy and girl that were bullying my brother that was in 1st grade. The girl called me a “fat ass” and said I was ugly. I once had a boy ask me out in 6th grade. I was so excited because I had a crush on him but then I caught him and his friends laughing out by the busses because it was a dare and he would never date a “chubby girl”. My first day in gym class at a totally new school in 8th grade I was called fat outright by another girl when we were changing out of our gym uniforms. A guy I really liked my junior year of high school said I was a really cool person but I didn’t fit the kind of “body” he liked for a girl, but we could be friends. When one of my ex boyfriend’s and I broke up he told everyone and anyone that I was a whale and that sleeping with me was like watching blubber bounce everywhere and that he would never date a chubby girl again because it was gross. (He later apologized and said he only said those things to hurt my feelings and that he still thought I was beautiful and not fat)
I’m lucky that those are the only real instances that I can really remember people calling me fat. Others aren’t so lucky and hear it daily, so many times that it all runs together. But, it all still hurts none the less. You never quite shake those words out of your brain and they’re always int he back of my mind when I look at myself in the mirror.
